Paraphilias

I really don’t know what this word means. According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM IV), paraphilias are recurrent, intense, sexually-arousing fantasies, sexual urges or behaviors generally involving nonhuman objects, the suffering or humiliation of oneself or one’s partner, or children or other non-consenting persons. Upon reading the definition, sa pagkakaintindi ko, guilty ako diyan. Am I the only one? Nope. Sigurado ako, meron pang iba. 

Voyeurism and Exhibitionism are common. Both voyeurism and exhibitionism are considered paraphilias. Minsan hindi lang natin alam na ‘yun na ‘yon. Most of us have a little voyeur or exhibitionist in us. In my case mukhang hindi siya little. Pero how can we know when is little and when is much? Hindi ko din alam. Gut feel na lang siguro. I don’t know how to categorize what paraphilia or paraphilias I am in to but I guess it falls mostly to voyeurism and exhibitionism.

Capturing photos or recording intimate moments. Taking naked or sexy pictures. Feeling hornier when I know someone is watching me making out or even just the thought of it. And the weirdest of all, being aroused by watching good loking guys suffer in a bloody and gory manner. May insecurity yata ako sa kanila haha.

Ilan lang yan sa mga gawain I feel good about. Wala naman akong nasasaktan or natatapakan. But for the conservative ones at sa mga nagmamalinis, ito daw ay imoral. Minsan napapaisip din ako kung nasaan ba talaga ang hangganan ng pagiging moral at imoral. Ang boundary ng kabutihan at ng kasalanan. Tingin ko wala din naman tunay na nakaaalam. Kalimitan ay base sa libro lamang na kung tutuusin ay tao lang din naman ang may katha.

I don’t believe a hundred percent in the bible but that don’t necessarily mean I don’t’ believe in God. Of course I do. And I know na mas malawak ang pangintindi ng Diyos kaysa sa libro na nalilimitahan lamang ng tinta at papel. Ito ay opinyon ko lamang.

Back to paraphilias bago pag may umusbong na kung ano..

If paraphilias are considered to be a disorder hindi naman siguro tama na isiping ito’y kasalan. People should help those people who are no longer in control of such disorder or at least try to broaden their thinking para sila maintindihan instead na mahusgahan. Hindi natin alam kung ano ang istorya nila bago sila nagkaganyan. Don’t judge quickly. Respect differences. Try putting yourself in their shoes. Malay mo, mag-enjoy ka din. =]